Actual Report
ANCHORAGE, Alaska - In a move hailed by environmentalists, the Bush administration announced it will review whether polar bears should be considered a threatened species given indicators that their icy habitats are melting away due to global warming.
Rephrased at the local pub
ENCOURAGE, Alas! In a move hailed by politicians, the administration announced it will review whether the citizens should be considered a threatened species given indicators that their belligerent habits are losing away due to global unrest.
ANCHORAGE, Alaska - In a move hailed by environmentalists, the Bush administration announced it will review whether polar bears should be considered a threatened species given indicators that their icy habitats are melting away due to global warming.
Rephrased at the local pub
ENCOURAGE, Alas! In a move hailed by politicians, the administration announced it will review whether the citizens should be considered a threatened species given indicators that their belligerent habits are losing away due to global unrest.