TEARS IN DISGUISE

TEARS IN DISGUISE

As I turned to depart
it hurt so much;

reluctant to look back

lest my folks and friends
see the tears in my eyes

that I tried hard to disguise

and if I could make believe

it was just plain cold sweat.

Tall coconut trees
in the gentle evening breeze
tried to firmly hold their sway;

outside on the patio at sunset,
men were absorbed in conversation,

while in the balcão

the women folk convened

 to plan paddy fields for sowing

in time before the onset
of monsoon rains impending.

Then as darkness fell

 and homewards I walked,

 seeing a score of people together pray,

by the wayside cross I stopped;

light from the candles

reflected in their faces

singing in perfect chorus,

their gaze at the cross

fixed as if by magic;

hearing them sing the Litany,

and unable to resist

I joined them in harmony.

Tony Fernandes

GOODBYE

GOODBYE

Goodbye and farewell are not easy

as they are always resonant

of nostalgia and yearning,

of anxiety and reminiscence,

to depart at the thought and uncertainty
of meeting again

those you hold so dear.

The old banyan tree still stood there aloft,
but somewhat stooped was the mango tree,
my name on its bark
when young I had carved

I could barely see.

The nunerca tree is long dead and gone;

It’s shade so cool that once sheltered

children ten score or more

playing beneath surroundings so sylvan.

The gulmohar by the village chapel
so magnificent,

though a little frail and bent

still brought back memories

of its flowers so fragrant.

  

“When will you return?”

My childhood friend asked

“I know not” I said as I gasped.

“Will meet again for certain

before I depart”

“Certainly we will” I heard him say

as to hide a tear I turned away.

Tony Fernandes

A Visit to My Village

A Visit to My Old Village

The Sojourn

An evening stroll
in my tiny old  village I took;

saw the old folks

once so young,

now so frail and weak.

Aged with time at nature’s quest

they stared at me in total disbelief;

they seem to think I too

have aged along with them perhaps

yet neither of us could fathom

what time and years

had done to us in tandem.

Stories we had to tell in plenty

of days gone by in time so lengthy,

and as evening turned to twilight

it was time for us to bid “boa noite.”

Since my last visit

many years had elapsed,

had promised myself

that some day in the future

I will once again meet

the folks who I had left behind

from times so sweet.

Tony Fernandes